Suitcase Nuke Turns Up Empty at Clemson U.
Clemson University just sent out an all-points-emergency-bulletin email letting everybody rest assured that the latest terrorist plot has been foiled:
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ALERT: Abandoned briefcase posed no threat [7/10/07, 1:41 p.m.] Clemson University police received a call of concern about an abandoned briefcase in Barre Hall early today (July 10). Officers retrieved the briefcase, took it to the university police station and called the Anderson bomb squad as a precaution. The bomb squad came and checked it in the parking lot outside the police station. It was found to contain no threat. “As a matter of fact, it was empty,” Chief Johnson Link said. “We encourage Clemson employees and students to be cognizant of their surroundings and report any suspicious items or people to the police. Safety is our primary concern.” Clemson University Police Department can be reached at 656-2222. – —————————————————————- For additional information, contact the Clemson University Police Department VOICE: 864/656-2222 TTY: 864/656-1833 FAX: 864/656-0714 |
Post 9/11 has generated countless instances of holy indignation and overreaction by officials to what we civilians consider trivial and silly. See:
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Student’s History Project (Replica Civil War Musket) Puts TWO Schools on Lockdown,
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Boy Passes Exam Even After Bomb Squad Blows Up His Coursework,
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Bomb Squad Detonates Suspicious Ball of Paper With Tape on It,
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Police Mistake Six-Pack of Beer For Explosives, Call In Bomb Squad,
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(Near Clemson): Bomb Squad Removes Beer Can From Porch,
Could it be that the many bomb squads are stretching to justify their existence, or do they just love blowing stuff up?
Even so, you have to somewhat admire Clemson’s zealous over-compliance with The Clery Act, which is another unconstitutional federal program that schools are required to comply with to get federal financial aid funds (there is no federal power to dole out monies to educational institutions, and is expressly forbidden by the 10th Amendment). Nevertheless, the law:
. . . requires institutions to give timely warnings of crimes that represent a threat to the safety of students or employees. . . . The institution is only required to notify the community of crimes which are covered by the Clery statistics.
It would be amazing to learn how the abandonment of a suitcase is either a crime or imminent threat, or even why notification to the student body after it was learned that the suitcase was entirely empty complies with the Clery Act. Solve this riddle on your own and call the Clemson University Police Department if you think you’ve found the answer.
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